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Wednesday, August 14, 2019

Facebook and Divorce !!! What is and Is not Legal??

So, you and your ex have had it out, and now you want to go on let's say, "Facebook", and tell all the dirt to everyone....well...maybe the question IS--- should you, to begin with,  and if you do, will it come back to haunt you, is it illegal, and can you get into legal trouble to start with??????

So what kind of "secrets" can you, or should you start talking about on social media, and which might help get you into trouble--even if you claim you didn't know you would get into trouble?  After all don't people go on Jerry Springer, Maury, and all those shows on TV and not get into trouble????  (below is from findlaw blog link here)

Private Facts, Public Forum

Just because you know something about your ex, doesn't mean the whole world should. Part of building a relationship is trusting that you can confide in another person and that they won't go telling everyone on Facebook or Twitter. Beyond a betrayal of trust, you could get sued.

There are many ways to make an invasion of privacy claim, and one of them is public disclosure of private facts. While state law can vary on the subject, there are generally 3 elements to a public disclosure of private facts claim:

The disclosed fact must be a private fact;
There must be a public disclosure of the private fact(s); and
The public disclosure of private facts must be offensive to a reasonable person of ordinary sensibilities.
Some states may have additional elements, but if you're ripping an ex on social media, just know you could be liable for airing their dirty laundry.

Illegal Revenge

One of the more common and odious forms of online retaliation is revenge porn, or posting explicit photos or video of an ex to pornography websites... the Federal Trade Commission and some states have begun to outlaw the practice, adding criminal penalties for distributing intimate photographs or video that was intended to be private.
[Sac Blogger Note: CA law specifically has been passed as to revenge porn, PC 647(j)(4)...Revenge porn is similar to but distinct from the related crime of “invasion of privacy.” With invasion of privacy, the defendant secretly records sexual images of another person, without his/her knowledge or consent...]

So the last thing you should ever do is post an ex's sexually explicit secrets on social media. If an ex has dished a little too publicly about your private history, you may want to ask an experienced attorney about your options, and keep in mind there may be criminal repercussions to getting even with an ex online.

Sac Attorney Blogger Note:  It is dangerous in any custody case or visitation issue, to EVER post anything on Facebook that could make you look bad, period. Many dumb people post everything on Facebook when they should not.

Related Resources:

 Legal Options For Fighting Back Against Online Harassment (FindLaw Blotter)

 Rules for Social Media Use During Divorce
(FindLaw's Law and Daily Life)

Unwanted Facebook Photo: Invasion of Privacy?
 (FindLaw's Injured)
- See more at:

Friday, September 14, 2018


Custody and TRO Temporary Restraining Orders

Domestic violence related Restraining Orders are a huge problem, and if you either need to fight one, or obtain one, be forewarned-- it's very easy to GET a TRO, and defending against them is best reserved for defense attorneys or at least attorneys who know litigation and not just "settlement."

Very few TRO claims are readily settled--clients are either too upset, too physically harmed, or they made up facts in order to get back at a spouse. Attorney has seen plenty of vindictive TROs over the years. Often Judges just rubberstamp them, and issue them for 3 years.

Beware if you need to defend against a DV TRO, because a vindictive spouse is the most difficult to work with. Knowing that, you will need a lot of help to prevail.
Make sure your attorney can properly defend and fight for you.  If not, you stand to lose quite a bit, both financially, and emotionally.

If the DV TRO is issued against a party, that party cannot presumptively be the custodial parent.
This means that automatically, unless proven otherwise, you are out of the picture as custodial parent, even if you already were the custodial parent. This would likely require a trial to change that.

The best defense in such a case is to be prepared ahead of time, not after the fact. Make sure your attorney is not simply focused on settling everything while you lose out. Much of divorce these days requires the ability to litigate for the client. Settling does not always work.